Deez Nuts Has Started a Revolution

More than 60 people and/or fictional characters have filed to run for president since Thursday.

Planter's Mr. Peanut attends the 86th Annual Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade on November 22, 2012 in New York City.
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Matt Berman, Nora Kelly and Emma Roller
Aug. 21, 2015, 7:19 a.m.

On Ju­ly 26, a 15-year-old Iowa boy named Brady Olson filed to run for pres­id­ent. Since re­gis­ter­ing with the Fed­er­al Elec­tion Com­mis­sion un­der a crude pseud­onym, Deez Nuts, Olson’s joke cam­paign ap­pears to have spurred an up­tick in oth­er less-than-ser­i­ous pres­id­en­tial fil­ings.

On Wed­nes­day, a Pub­lic Policy Polling poll showed Deez Nuts with 9 per­cent sup­port in North Car­o­lina, res­ult­ing in a swarm of me­dia cov­er­age — in­clud­ing some par­tic­u­larly awk­ward loc­al news seg­ments. On Thursday alone, the FEC pos­ted more than 60 state­ments of pres­id­en­tial can­did­a­cies. Com­pare that with this Monday and Tues­day com­bined, when the FEC pos­ted just 12 fil­ings. Or last Thursday, when the com­mis­sion pos­ted three.

It’s in­cred­ibly simple to be­come an “of­fi­cial” pres­id­en­tial can­did­ate. All you have to do is send a State­ment of Can­did­acy, called Form 2, to the FEC of­fice with your name, ad­dress, party af­fil­i­ation, and the of­fice you’re seek­ing. Al­though this en­sures that, at least nom­in­ally, it’s easy for any­one to run for pres­id­ent, it also makes the FEC an easy tar­get for prank­ing.

And, as one can tell from some of the more pre­pos­ter­ous per­son­al in­form­a­tion turned in­to the FEC lately, none of the in­form­a­tion filed by the “can­did­ates” is in­de­pend­ently veri­fied by the agency be­fore the fil­ing is pos­ted. If a can­did­ate files Form 2 with “miss­ing or in­ad­equate in­form­a­tion,” the FEC will send a let­ter to the can­did­ate. “The let­ter will re­quest the can­did­ate to sub­mit a new Form 2 with­in 30 days,” ac­cord­ing to FEC’s of­fi­cial re­view and re­fer­ral pro­ced­ures.

Here is a sampling of the more ob­vi­ously false cam­paigns of the 60-plus that were launched on Thursday alone. So yeah, this doesn’t in­clude Fran­cis J. Un­der­wood, Queen Elsa, or even Elsa is bae, whose fil­ings were all pos­ted Wed­nes­day.

Butt Stuff

The in­ev­it­able suc­cessor to “Deez Nuts.” See also the earli­er “Sydneys Vo­lup­tu­ous But­tocks.”

Mr. Tyri­on Lan­nis­ter

But really: We wouldn’t put it past the Amer­ic­an people to vote for every­one’s fa­vor­ite Game of Thrones char­ac­ter. Ad­dress lis­ted on the form: Essos St. in Essos, North Car­o­lina.

Mr. Not Sure

This is a pretty straight­for­ward one joke can­did­ate that even your dad would likely ap­pre­ci­ate. Who do you sup­port for pres­id­ent? Not Sure! Ha Ha Ha. The can­did­ate’s cam­paign com­mit­tee: Not Sure for Pres­id­ent 2016.

Jean-Luc Pi­card

To be fair, the cap­tain and com­mand­er of the USS En­ter­prise would prob­ably make for an ex­cel­lent pres­id­ent. As long as he stays clear of the Borg. Sug­ges­ted cam­paign slo­gan: “Make it so.”

Sir TrippyCup aka Young Trip­pz aka The GOAT aka The Proph­et aka Earl

If this per­son had shortened their name to just “The Proph­et,” maybe they’d have had a chance.

DOGED Doge coin Dark

A trib­ute to Shiba Inus? An ad­vert­ise­ment for Doge­coin (“favored by Shiba Inus world­wide”)? We’ll likely nev­er know.

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King Prescott Satan

If he wants to corner the Satan­ist vote, the Prince of Dark­ness would face stiff com­pet­i­tion from at least four oth­er can­did­ates freshly lis­ted Thursday: King Satan Smith, Mrs. Luci Fer, Duke Crantiffinus Ad­raguizes Pox­tific­ate (of the Com­mit­tee for Satan’s Wel­fare), and H. Majesty Satan Lord of Un­der­world Prince of Dark­ness.

It has been widely ana­lyzed how Wash­ing­ton out­sider can­did­ates with zero polit­ic­al ex­per­i­ence are get­ting more play than usu­al this primary cycle. And while the jokesters above don’t have a chance at be­ing the next Don­ald Trump, they can at least say they’re on trend.

Contributions by Stephanie Stamm

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