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An Ode To Scandal

November 7, 2013
PHOTO CREDITS: Rob Ford: City of Toronto; Mark Sanford: Getty Images/William Thomas Cain; Anthony Weiner: Getty Images/Spencer Pratt; Bill Clinton: Getty Images/Daniel Berehulak


Rob Ford is a good reminder that, while it's always bad for a politician to lie to the public, there is great pleasure to be taken in when a politician is caught lying badly. Part of that pleasure lies in observing the visible strain a man pretending to understand the gravity of a transgression he obviously does not think is very serious (see, for example: Anthony Weiner.) But the best part is watching him lamely attempt to equivocate his way out of a scandal. It never works. It almost always makes things worse. But strung together, the rhetorical hedging can start to sound sort of...poetic.

Probably in one of my drunken stupors
I went hiking on the Appalachian Trail, and
I was hacked.

I don't want to say with certitude to you
Something that I don't know to be the certain truth.
I don't know what photographs
are out there in the world of me.

It depends on what the meaning of the word "is" is.

But I can assure people,
It doesn't happen again.

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