Skip Navigation

Close and don't show again.

Your browser is out of date.

You may not get the full experience here on National Journal.

Please upgrade your browser to any of the following supported browsers:

This Morning This Morning

This ad will end in seconds
Close X

Want access to this content? Learn More »

Forget Your Password?

Don't have an account? Register »

Reveal Navigation



This Morning

"Today" led with Pope Benedict XVI's visit. "Early Show" led with the pope's visit. "GMA" led with the pope's visit and hosted British PM Gordon Brown.

Hitting The Sauce

Last night on "Hardball," a Villanova Univ. student asked John McCain the following question about Hillary Clinton: "I'm sure you saw one of your Democratic opponents, Hillary Clinton, recently drinking whiskey shots with some potential voters. I was wondering if you think that she's finally resorted to hitting the sauce because of some unfavorable polling, and I was also wondering if you would care to join me for a shot after this?"


McCain, in response: "I did not see the clip of it, but I certainly heard about it, and whatever makes Senator Clinton happy is certainly ... You know, I've had two of the best questions, or the toughest questions that I have ever had ... in the last two questions" (MSNBC, 4/15).

As it turns out, the question came from Peter Doocy, son of FNC's Steve Doocy. Peter, who interned at "Fox & Friends" in '04, phoned into the show this a.m. to talk about his question (, 4/16).

P. Doocy, asked by his dad about the response his question has received: "It's been good. [The question was] an example of what college kids want to know about."


More P. Doocy, asked whether Chris Matthews might have recognized his last name: "I think that he might have. He looked a little grumpy. But I don't think it really mattered because nobody was there for Chris Matthews. Everybody was there for John McCain, and he did a great job. I think that was a good moment for him."

"That's my boy!"
--FNC's Steve Doocy, on his son asking McCain about Clinton getting "sauced," "Fox & Friends," 4/16.

Put Me In, Coach

FNC's Gretchen Carlson asked P. Doocy whether his father "coached" him in one-liners. P. Doocy: "I was not coached. The only thing that my dad ever taught me about shots was that I need to get tetanus and mumps when I was younger, that's it."

S. Doocy, interrupting: "Hey Peter, you lay off the sauce, too."


The Reaction

S. Doocy, on Peter's question: "That's my boy!"

Carlson: "It was a great question."

FNC's Brian Kilmeade: "Great job, Peter" (FNC, 4/16).

Time Is Not On Their Side

"According to the usage guidelines circulated by ABC," other news orgs. "are only allowed to excerpt half a minute" from tonight's 90-minute Dem WH '08 debate at the Nat'l Constitution Center's Kimmel Theater in Philly at 8 pm. "That means choosing only one 30-second clip to use on television and the Web between" 11 pm 4/16 and 5 am 4/17.

ABC "defends the restrictions as being 'very reasonable.'" An ABC spokesperson: "We have an obligation to our West Coast affiliates to not make chunks of the debate available until their viewers have had a chance to see them." By "tape-delaying the debate for its West Coast" stations, it seems ABC is "treating the debate as a television show rather than as a live news event. When cable news channels sponsor debates, they telecast the forums live across all time zones."

The cable news channels actually "may make it their business to skirt ABC's rules." FNC, CNN and MSNBC "can be expected to use 'fair use' justifications to show more clips from the debate, especially if" Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama "have a newsworthy exchange" (Stelter, "TV Decoder,", 4/15).

Stop By And Say Hi

PBS' Gwen Ifill will be online for her monthly webchat 4/17 at noon. Click here to speak with her.

Hostess With The Mostess

Laura Bush will guest-host the 9 am hour of NBC's "Today" 4/22. L. Bush, who will be the first FLOTUS to guest-host the program, will also be joined by her daughter, Jenna Bush, "earlier in the broadcast for a special look at their new children's book, 'Read All About It!" As a guest host, L. Bush "will learn the ins and outs of hosting a morning show, and she will participate in several segments and interviews." Moreover, she will give Ann Curry a "rare look" inside the Bush family ranch in Crawford, TX (release, 4/15).

A "Today" spokesperson said "there could also be a 'surprise' guest or two dropping by during the hour" (Starr, New York Post, 4/16).

Laugh Track

Jay Leno: "Today, a very exciting day for Catholics all across America. Pope Benedict XVI made his first trip to America today and witnessed a miracle ... at the airport. American Airlines flights were leaving on time. It's a miracle! ... And I thought this was kind of cool. You know, President Bush actually met the pope at the airport? He did. ... He picked him up. That wasn't easy. 'Cause, you know, they don't let you stop at the curb anymore. So, Bush had to keep circling. Bush is driving by, [and] the pope is trying to flag him down. ... Oh, it was a huge, huge, big deal. Although I don't think President Bush is too familiar with the Catholic religion. There was one awkward moment when President Bush kept looking behind the pope going, 'So, where's Mrs. Pope?' I don't quite think he understands. President Bush also told the pope that he has prayed every single day since he became president. Hey, since Bush became president, we've all prayed every single day. Now what do you think of this idea? This seemed odd to me. For the pope's arrival ceremony at the White House tomorrow, they're going to give him a 21-gun salute. Now, really, isn't there a better welcome for the Apostle of Peace than a show of firearms? I mean, whose idea was that? Dick Cheney's? ... Why do you have a 21-gun salute? Anyway, the pope will be visiting New York later in the week. He'll be doing a mass at Yankee Stadium. That'll be pretty cool. Then, he's gonna spend over 12 hours hearing the sins of the two New York governors. So, that should be fascinating. That'll be all day. Oh, we also want to wish Pope Benedict a happy birthday. Tomorrow, he'll be 81 years old. The pontiff, 81 years old. Do you realize in a couple more years, he could be the next Republican nominee?" ("Tonight Show," NBC, 4/15).

David Letterman: "It's exciting to be here now because you know what's going to happen? The pope is coming to New York City. Can you feel the excitement? He arrived earlier today in Washington, D.C. Of course, he flew Virgin Atlantic. ... But did you hear about this? He's getting on the flight in Rome, and he was almost not allowed on the aircraft because he tried to bring on more than three ounces of holy water. That's right. The pope will be in Washington D.C. for two days. ... If you know anything about the pope, everything for the pope is first class. ... He'll be staying at the Mayflower, in their Eliot Spitzer suite. ... And then on Sunday, the pope will perform mass at Yankee Stadium. Here's how they'll break that down. He'll do 45 minutes and then Mariano Rivera will come in. Who? Mariano Rivera will close" ("Late Show," CBS, 4/15).

Jon Stewart: "I am going to tell you ... does anyone feel a little bit of a tingle? A little certain sense of spiritual enlightenment? ... Are you having trouble masturbating? Are you? Take your time. Because that can only mean one thing. The pope is here! He arrived in America ... just minutes ago. Hours ago. I hope he had a good trip. The only thing that you always worry about is, Americans are so busy, they work so hard. I hope someone had the time to go get him at the airport [on screen: networks talking about Pres. Bush meeting the pope at Andrews AFB]. ... The president picked up the pope at the airport. How bored is our president? He's not the president anymore. Now he's like your college stoner roommate, doing favors for pizza. Next week I think he's helping Putin move. Obviously picking up the pope at the airport is, I don't want to make fun. It's an important job. Been a very long flight. I'm sure the pope is probably a little tired. He gets off the plane. There's a lot of people there. You're gonna want to make sure you have proper signage when you get him [on screen: A photo of Bush at the airport, with a sign saying "POPE"]. ... And I'll tell you what else. Here is the real pain in the ass. You know the guy is here for six days, the pope, and you know what that means: checked luggage. Many bags look alike. ... Make sure you get his bag. ... They didn't lose his luggage. That's a miracle. Anyway, full coverage of the pope's visit tomorrow, if he clears customs. You know people hide weed in their miters" ("Daily Show," Comedy Central, 4/15).

Stephen Colbert: "The big story from the campaign trail is still Senator Obama's comments that many small town folks are bitter, so they 'cling to guns or religion.' This is indefensible, but it does prove he is the candidate of hope. He certainly gave hope to Hillary Clinton's campaign. Because, sure, folks in small town America are losing their jobs, their houses, and millions of them are uninsured, but the biggest problem is that Barack Obama condescended to them. Which brings us to tonight's 'Word': Tradition. Now, folks, personally I love being condescended to. And so do the wonderful people of Pennsylvania! ... But Obama's comments proves he's out of touch with ordinary people, ordinary people like reluctant multimillionaire Hillary Clinton. She understands that guns and religion are proud family traditions that are handed down from generation to generation. Dick Cheney has a similar story. Only it ends with him shooting his father in the face. ... My problem is not that Senator Obama condescended. It's that he did it the wrong way. This is how you do it. Sucking down pizza, raising the roof, eating Huck-a-burgers and shaving old men. That gives voters like me the sense that the candidates are just like me. The sad part is, Senator Obama showed such promise in the past. Look at him. Completely out of keeping with his personal narrative, feeding a cow. [on screen: Obama feeding a cow a bottle of milk]. But he delivered it with pitch perfect pandering, bravo! But, this new "bitter" statement is classic Obama. All condescension with flowery words. No condescension with actions. You really want to make it seem like you're going to make jobs come back? Then at least make the effort once every four years to put on a hard hat and get photographed pulling a factory lever. And maybe people are bitter with the failure of their government. But isn't the best way to get that taste out of their mouth with a pancake breakfast? This whole controversy just reminds people that Barack Obama may not have the experience to be the condescender-in-chief. Look how uncomfortable he is pretending to like bowling [on screen: Obama bowling]. On the other hand, look how comfortable Hillary is pretending to be comfortable [on screen: Clinton taking a shot of whiskey]. Senator Clinton can condescend the right way because Senator Clinton is not an elitist. She understands that you have to respect the American people. Unless the American people want Barack Obama, in which case you really got to have the superdelegates decide. Somebody's got to save us from rubes, and that's 'The Word'" ("Colbert Report," Comedy Central, 4/15).

Jimmy Kimmel: "This morning, Pope Benedict arrived in the United States. I was up all night cleaning, I swear. It's the new pope's first visit to the United States, and President Bush did something today that no president has ever done for a world leader. He went to the airport to pick him up. Here's the president. [on screen: Photo of Bush at the airport, with a sign for the pope]. He made the sign himself actually. That's nice. More than 10,000 people are on the waiting list to get into the pope's mass at Yankee Stadium on Sunday. That's Hannah Montana big. That's really big. I do like Pope Benedict. This pope is the first pope in history who's named after my favorite way to eat eggs. The pope has a very busy schedule during his six-day trip. He has the White House today. He's got masses in Washington, D.C., and in New York" ("Jimmy Kimmel Live," ABC, 4/15).

                   (as presented by a group of accountants)
           10. My exciting lifestyle is the envy of all my claims
               adjuster colleagues.
            9. I made ten grand doing taxes for Leona Helmsley's
            8. Numbers are my only friends.
            7. What other job allows you to show up for work in
               just a suit and tie?
            6. Mild-mannered day job protects my true identity:
            5. I'm always the first to hear about all the latest
               calculator innovations.
            4. I was a finalist on last season's "Accounting With
               The Stars."
            3. When some idiot asks me about a form 8038-G
               information return for tax-exempt governmental
               obligation, when they really mean a form 1038-R
               recovery of overpayment under arbitrage rebate
               provisions -- that s***'s hilarious!
            2. If I screw up something, you go to jail, not me!
            1. I get more tail than George Clooney (CBS, 4/15). 

comments powered by Disqus